Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: Arizona, birthday, Christmas, dinner, family, food, friends, in-laws, Pasadena, Rose Bowl, stress, travel, wine
Why do I do this every year? This Christmas season brought a tremendous amount of stress…..the season always does but this year was a bit more than I should have taken on and I’ll be paying for it for years to come.
In a nutshell this is what we did in chronological order, beginning at the first of the month:
* Attend the Oregon Civil War Game
* Attend MFH company Christmas party
* Had our friends 30th birthday party at our home
* Hosted the junior youth group progressive dinner (the main course of course)
AND ALL OF THIS WAS JUST THE FIRST WEEKEND! Then:
* Flew down to Arizona for a 4 day weekend to visit the in-laws
* Starved and fasted to win the Biggest Loser contest (which I did)
* Hosted the office Christmas party at our home
* Sold a home & took 3 new listings
* Took an entire day to bake treats with my daughter
* Attended 3 Christmas Eve open houses
* Hosted Christmas dinner for my family including out-of-town overnight guests
AND IN THE WEEK TO COME:
* Driving down to Pasadena to attend the Rose Bowl!
All of a sudden I have a raging headache just thinking about it. But the real question is why? Why must I do this every year? And it’s only getting worse; I keep taking on more every year. In all honesty there were a few days when I thought I was going to have a nervous breakdown but fortunately I’m way to stubborn to let that happen, so I pressed on…..and had drink or two to get me through.
So, here are some fun highlights of this past month:
* The progressive dinner took place with 16 unruly “youth” in my home and 5 adult drivers. These were all people from my church and the dinner was the day after the 30th birthday party, which had a Las Vegas theme and was too much fun for MFH who spent the entire next day in bed. The host was still in the process of cleaning up the house and the birthday girl was asleep in my daughter’s bed….don’t ask me why but she was. When one adult wanted a tour of my home another person/friend gave her the tour but told her not to go into my daughter’s room because there was someone in there sleeping off a hangover…..she was horrified……it got better when MFH decided to come out of his cave, walked right into the kitchen wearing his PJ’s and looking pretty ripe; the adults were eating and I was mortified. I did A LOT of explaining and some of it was fictitious.
* Every time MFH and I fly anywhere it’s always a nightmare. He gets really uptight and bossy…..which is my job. The highlight of our arrival into the Phoenix Sky Harbor airport was our departure from the airplane. As we exited he walked about 10 feet faster than I could catch up to him and I wanted my roller suitcase so that I didn’t have to carry my shoulder bag……so I asked him to stop, politely. Then I asked again (thinking he didn’t hear me the first time). Still he continued walking. Then I got a little more stern and a bit louder with “Dammit, stop!”. Almost everyone ahead of me stopped…..including him 
I got my bag but not without a fight. MFH marched off ahead of me again and this time I let him have it…..something like “What the hell is your hurry, calm the f*** down!” I’m not sure what he said next but I flipped him off. I’m pretty sure we looked like a couple in love.
* This past Father’s Day we hosted our dad’s and their wives for a very nice dinner. Everything was wonderful, food was great, company was very pleasant, there was just one small mishap. My father-in-law can’t keep up with my father when it comes to wine consumption. Don’t get me wrong, he made a great effort……one that made him very sick for a few days. I mention this because this Christmas my mother-in-law attended our dinner and she similarly also got sick….in my kitchen sink. To be clear it was not from alcohol consumption…..which doesn’t say a whole lot for my cooking.
So now there’s just one more hurdle before normalcy can resume, getting down to Pasadena for the Rose Bowl. Considering all that we’ve done this month I’m actually looking forward to a road trip…..it will force me to sit down. Once we get there however, that should be another story
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: biggest loser, diet, dieting, family, food, health, loose, mental health, support, weight
No, I’m not hungry for anything strange and metephysical, the thrist for knowledge, hungry to learn, none of that garbage….this blog is not serious or deep, it’s literal……..I’m hungry!
Two days ago marked the beginning of the end of my weight gain. We’ve started a “Biggest Loser” contest at my office and being highly competitive in nature and knowing that I could stand to loose a few pounds and inches I happily plunked down the $20 entry fee and have now begun my journey down the path of “The Dieter”. This is not a path that I find particularly enjoyable but the winner gets the pot, consisting of all participant fees. Right now I’m not sure how many are actually participating but that doesn’t really matter……although hopefully it will be enough for me to buy some new jeans, since I’ll need them!
OK, so it’s only day 3 and so far, so good. I’ve been up every morning working out for at least 1 hour and I’ve limited my food consumption to fruits, veggies and low fat foods. I’ve decided to cut out breads, pastas, rice and crackers…..all foods that I have eaten regularly and mostly out of convenience. I honestly am beginning to feel better, not so bloted all the time. I knew I would feel better and I’m thankful for that if for nothing else, but what I didn’t see coming however is the total and complete LACK of SUPPORT!
So I guess that I should have seen it coming, it’s a contest afterall. Don’t get me wrong, I’m about the least sensitive person out there so it’s not as though my feelings have been hurt it’s just that some people are being evil (and you know who you are)! Other participants in my office are leaving messages on my Facebook page like “Come into the office and we’ll get you a cupcake with extra frosting” or how about the status update “does anyone in my office want a cookie? loaf of bread??” I know I should have expected it. So how do I combat the big talkers? By not saying anything and quietly dropping the 25 pounds that I want to loose and by taking the winnings and laughing all the way to the Mexican Riviera! Maybe they are more motivational than I give them credit for.
Dieting has also given me a hightened awareness of food advertising. Take today for example. I was listening to Dr. Laura in the car and a commercial came on for Sheri’s Restaurant. Care to guess what today is?? That’s right, it’s free pie Wednesday……shoot me! I love Sheri’s pies. And they don’t just say “It’s free pie Wednesday” they have to go into all of the different pie flavors…..like Banana Cream, Marionberry, Strawberry Rhubarb, Peach, Lemon Merange…….you get the point. I was so busy foaming at the mouth that it didn’t occur to me to change the channel until it was too late, the damage to my pysche was done.
Kids can be brutal too. Last night FD came home from her volleyball game and off-loaded the bag of goodies given to her by her “secret sister” which included crackers, candy, a coke and countless other yummy treats. I gave her the evil eye and that’s all it took. She bagged up her treats and headed for her room faster than you can say Hot Tamales! The problem is that now I know where to go to find “real food”.
I’m learning something through this process though, dieting is not so much about loosing weight as it is about gaining self-control. Over time and over the years it’s been easy to make excuses for not eating right but what it really comes down to our ability to say no, make good choices and stick to good habits. While I’ve also been reminded that support comes from within I’m also reminded that the choice to not pay rent for office space at my company’s location was the best decision as far as dieting success!!
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: birthday, Christianity, crazy, elderly, family, God, grandmother, guilt, Jesus, mother, religion
Hello my faithful friends, readers and curiosity freaks…..life’s good!
So I came home after a fun-filled and much deserved week long vacation with the family to find an e-mail in my inbox from CAM (Crazy Ass Mother……which is literally what my mother is). This was a surprise because CAM and I don’t communicate….or at least I don’t make it a habit to communicate with her cause SHE’s CRAZY (cue the cuckoo clock sound).
Anyway, long story short….I was pissed. I have spent hundreds, if not thousands of dollars trying to get over the fact that up until I was 14 I was raised by a raging alcoholic self-centered slut bitch (sorry for the fowl mouth but it is what it is). In fact, in the last 5 years I’ve been fairly successful at keeping her at bay (as you will read in her own words).
Let me set the stage for the e-mail rant that I received; and know that you will have the opportunity to read it in it’s entirety for that is how I have chosen to respond…..to share it with everyone I know, and a few that I don’t! My grandmother turned 90 this last July and CAM somehow positioned herself as the person responsible for setting up the party (consisting of mostly other elderly people and a small amount of family). My family, MFH, FD, FS and myself were the only people coming in from out of town (party in Tacoma, Washington). I was informed that the party was to take place on Sunday the 5th of July at 10am. In fact this was the message left on my cell phone by CAM:
SUGARY, FAKE TALK: “Hi Stacy it’s mom (which irritates me when she calls herself that), I wanted to let you know that Gramma’s party is going to be on Sunday July 5th at 10am. Now I know that it’s not a convenient time…….but I hope that you can make it.”
I know that you don’t know her but trust me when I tell you she did this on purpose! Why wouldn’t someone that wanted me and my family to be there ask me my opinion BEFORE making the reservations? She didn’t give a shit, that’s why.
Now, to really understand the family dynamic I would have to spend hours writing and I’m sure you would be bored beyond belief so I’ll spare you…..because I care Long story short, we didn’t go, it wasn’t convenient and frankly if I was being dead honest I didn’t want to be around CAM, at all.
So it’s a month later and I haven’t talked with my Grandmother since I sent her a beautiful bouquet of flowers on her birthday and instead I get the following e-mail from CAM:
“I really don’t know where to begin to say what needs to be said. Guess I’ll dive right in.
Your hurtfulness knows no bounds, but I’m thinking you know that. It’s a travesty that you have kept your children from their grandmother, from the fun and nurturing they’d have in relationship with me, for well over 5 years. Your bitterness towards me has now slopped over onto your grandmother, who has always loved you so much, and the kids’ great-grandmother, who celebrated a rare and precious event, her 90th birthday, without them. Since then, you’ve been intent on self-justification and accusations as reasons for not attending. Forget it. It’s over. I’m truly sad because your bitterness is only hurting you, and your family.
Stacy, no one is saved and secure in his or her eternal destiny by occupying a church pew, by saying “grace” before meals, by confirmation, baptism, church traditions, or membership. And if you’re not walking with the Lord, you are His enemy……in rebellion against God. Your hard-heartedness towards me is proof that you’re not saved, because you could not do what you’ve done for the past 5+ years if you were. It’s just not spiritually possible. But today, right now, you can cry out to Jesus to save you, and He will give you a brand-new heart, as the Bible says, “…a heart of flesh.”
You missed a wonderful celebration of Grandma’s birthday……90!!! And she’s totally “with it,” works the crosswords, drives very well, cares for her home and cats, etc….etc!!!! And most important of all, my mom and I enjoy one another, share love and fun, and just wish we had more time together. Now that’s the “fruit of the Spirit,” nothing that Mom or I have done, but totally the answer to prayer and the work of God. Not attending Grandma’s party was your loss. Sure, your grandmother was hurt, terribly hurt, and I’d have loved to see you all. But we had a great time, made memories, and shared great joy, all gifts from God. We were truly blessed.
I pray to God every day to save you, but first you must be broken, just like everybody else. I pray for that, because there is absolutely nothing more important than your salvation….nothing. Stacy, my precious daughter, I beg you to turn from your bitterness and unloving ways, repent of your sins, surrender your life to the One who loves you more than any person ever could. He’ll never let you down. And when you get that new heart, let’s get together and share the love God plants in the hearts of those who believe on the matchless name of the Savior, Jesus.
I love you. Mom”
And you wonder why it’s cost so much to work out my issues with this woman? She doesn’t even know what the word “saved” means! I like Kat’s response when I read her this e-mail. She said “tell her that you spoke with Jesus and he told you that she is bat-shit crazy and that you should stay away from her!”
That’s really what I wanted to say but I thought about it overnight and when I woke up I realized that was what CAM was hoping for, a response. And she would take any response. So I decided not to give her the satisfaction of a response at all (cue the evil laugh).
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: appreciation, chores, family, humor, kids, spouse, surgery
This last week has been a true test of my family’s ability to “step up” and help out more around the house and with me in general. Since my elbow surgery on Friday the 3rd, I haven’t been able to do much around the house and have had very limited use of my right hand and arm. Even the simplest of tasks is a chore for me and I’m not used to being an invalid so I have been hopeful that the other members of my household would take on a few more tasks, willingly……but as you may guess that has not always been the case…..at least not the “willingly” part.
Rather than launch into a long diatribe of how disappointed I am I would prefer to make this post about some of the comedic observations that I’ve noted this last week. In an effort to boost my morale and offer something humorous to my readers here are a few noted items:
- Other members of my household have no problem sitting at a table that has not been wiped off after 3 or more uses. They also do not have a problem preparing food on a kitchen counter that hasn’t been wiped down for 4 days. This makes me cringe.
- It’s taken me about 5 days but I am an ace at brushing my teeth with my left hand. If you haven’t tried brushing your teeth with the hand that you don’t usually use I would challenge you to try it. It’s not easy at first.
- Washing hair and body with one hand is next to impossible. Having a spouse do it is more fun for them than for you, trust me.
- Teenage daughters do not like to be asked to help mom hook her bra, but they do like doing mom’s hair!
- It is possible to apply deodorant to the armpit connected to the arm, connected to the hand of the same arm. It’s not a pretty look ( a bit monkey-like) but it works.
- It’s a bit embarrassing going to dinner and asking someone to cut your meat. It’s even more embarrassing to try to eat the meat uncut.
- It takes three to four times as long to write down a phone number with my left hand. As a side note I understand that I’m challenging my brain, so that’s good!
- Tweenage boys get a lot of entertainment value out of seeing how close I can come to touching my nose and/or hair with my bad hand/arm, but encouragement is everything “go, go, go, go, go mom, you can do it!”
So this last week has made me learn to appreciate my right arm…..that sounds really weird but I think that you get the picture. I’m not sure that my family has learned to appreciate me at all. The laundry is overflowing, the floors need vacuuming and dust bunnies are making homes in every corner of the living room (I know this because my daughter pointed it out, and laughed). I’ll be the last one laughing though, the kid’s chore board is filled today, they’ll be up till midnight!
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: Arizona, crazy, envy, family, inlaws, jealously, Mesa, retire, retirement, vacation, weather
I apologize for my brief hiatus, I just returned from a trip to Mesa Arizona to visit with the in-laws. AND I couldn’t have picked a better time of the year to fly south because it’s frickin’ freezing up here in Oregon!
All four of us me, my FD & FS and MFH were all flown down by my very generous father-in-law for four days and nights to spend his birthday with him. We had a great time (thank you for asking) and when we returned home Sunday night I fell into a deep depression….it was cold and I didn’t want to go to work the next day.
So, when I did wake up on Monday morning I was a 38 year old woman who became a 15 year old rebellious teenager with the raging (and often irritating) hormonal see-saw style attitude that literally lasted until I went to bed last night. Fortunately for MFH, I’m over it, somewhat.
Here’s my problem: I WANT TO RETIRE TOO (you have to say that in a very whiney, irritating childlike way). My in-laws are living the life that I want and I want it now!! Not in 20 years, NOW!
The in-laws are snowbirds. They live from April through September up here and are in Arizona during the winter (although the winter for them is 7 months!) They are not what you might call “wealthy”, both of their homes are very modest, in fact their place in Mesa is a park model (which is a small mobile home). They have lived financially “smart” and were both fully retired at 61. They live in a retirement community when they are in Mesa, complete with a huge recreation hall, swimming pool indoors and out, workout facilities, and you wouldn’t believe the activities available to them! Water volleyball, glass & wood working classes, concerts (on site), dinners…..the list goes on. Not to mention the friends that they have made down there…..they are from all over the US and Canada. OH, and I won’t even get started on the daily cocktail hours in the evenings, on the deck, in the warm weather……….
Then I come home to reality. My daughter has her period, my son is a backtalking nightmare, my clients are all in bankruptsy, foreclosure, divorce, or are just generally pissed that their homes haven’t sold and all I can do is wish, hope, and pray that someday, somehow I will live long enough to retire. And then I think “I’m going to have to kill myself to get there!”……I guess that’s why retirement is so sweet.
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: beavers, civil war, college, ducks, family, fans, football, mascots, Oregon, Rose Bowl, uniersity
I’m a duck. Not the kind that quacks. OK, I’m more like a duck fan…..I was born in the place where The Ducks rule the town. If you’re not familiar with Oregon then you probably think I’ve lost my mind. I haven’t, I just find it hilarious that I live in a state where the two largest universities have mascots that are either a duck or a beaver. Those are not very imposing figures when it comes to sports teams!
The Bears, the Devils, the Lions…..those are mascots that are a whole lot more imposing than a duck. Yet living in Oregon, in the Fall during football season and attending the UofO football games, the mascot just makes sense! After all, there is very wet weather here and it’s perfect, if you’re a duck.
This Saturday, November 30th marks the 114th annual “Civil War” football game between the UofO Ducks (sometimes called The Fighting Ducks) and the OSU Beavers (a.k.a. The Beavs). This is one of the oldest rivalries in college football. It also happens to be a bit of a rivalry in my family and my neighborhood!
My brother graduated from OSU a few years ago and I believe that he was the first member of our family to have attended the school. My dad and grandfather both attended UofO. Brother Ryan’s smack talk about his Beavs has created a bit of animosity with me but my dad and MFH are less sensitive than I am and they’re having fun. There is also a very clear line of delineation in my neighborhood and I think that it’s a sad fact that more of my neighbors fly college flags than the American flag!!
Tomorrow’s game should prove to be a great match up, these two teams are very strong. A Beaver win could send them to the Rose Bowl for the first time in 40 years. In a way it would be nice to see to them win for that reason only. Then I remember that about 8 years ago the Ducks had the chance to go to the Rose Bowl and the deciding game was the Civil War……which the Ducks lost, smashing their Rose Bowl hopes. Can you say revenge??
So tomorrow we will don our green and yellow shirts, obnoxious pom-poms and our even more obnoxious duck bill quacker noise makers and cheer on the Mighty Fighting Ducks (because we need as many imposing adjectives as we can get)!! Let the game begin!
