Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: candy, cigarettes, distress, economy, fear, help, kids, moral, Obama, parents, Realtor, stranger, teachers
Do you remember when you were a kid and your parents and teachers would tell you to never take candy from a stranger? I do! I was so afraid that if a stranger ever offered me candy I would be a goner. Rape, death, abduction….all of these things and more would happen if I ever took candy from a stranger. Parents and teachers are very effective at scaring the shit out of kids. The funny thing is that as we grow older we forget the rule, we get bold, grow our own opinions, secure our own thoughts and completely forget the rule that we should never take candy from a stranger.
And I can prove it. Take a look at our current economic situation, our economy is dieing a slow and painful death and in my humble opinion it’s because we all forgot the rule: Never, I mean NEVER take candy from a stranger! We have all done it and now we’re going to pay the price.
I’m a Realtor. Currently I’m dealing with what I like to call “The Three D’s”: Divorce, Distress, and Death. These are my clients, and it’s very “D”epressing…..although I have this blog to help me cope. Divorce and death are typically unavoidable but it’s the issue of distress that may help prove my earlier point.
MANY of my clients are in financial distress and are defaulting on their home loans. In most circumstances it’s due to the fact that they never should have been allowed to purchase the home in the first place. In other words, purchasing a home just because they could do it didn’t mean that they should have done it and now they and the rest of the American people are paying for it. See, what happened was that a stranger came up and offered them candy and they forgot the rule and they took the candy and now they must suffer!
So then along comes the federal government, like a white knight on a steed and it ”has a plan”, and it’s a good one. It’s been called “the Obama Plan”, “Help for Homeowners”, “ Hope for Homeowners”, you name it, it’s your government to the rescue. But like a Snickers bar being held out to an unsuspecting child, just as we begin to move forward the “help” (or candy) gets yanked back and we now find ourselves struggling to break free, or worse, fighting for our livelihood.
That’s what happened this week. It’s been only one month since this “plan” has been rolled out and within 2 days mortgage interest rates rose over an entire percentage point to over 6%, leaving thousands of homeowners that were hoping for assistance now unable to get it and worse yet, significantly reducing buying power for perspective borrowers of homes that so desperately need to be sold.
But back to the moral of the story. Although I digressed into something morbid and disturbing (the economics of our country) I would like to point out that there are many lessons that our children are being taught today that will hopefully stay with them (but I have serious doubts). The “Stranger Danger” issue has taken a back seat to the new danger of smoking, almost to the point of absurdity but I’m not complaining. My kids are so in fear of cigarettes that they won’t even go into a restaurant where it’s ok to smoke, seriously they would rather starve!
So in looking back over what I’ve just written and in taking into account that we as adults grew up and are doing the opposite of what we were taught as children I suppose that I shouldn’t be surprised if someday FS or FD becomes the CEO of Phillip Morris?
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: bank, bankers, banks, borrowers, crazy, customer service, death, frusteration, hair, hardship, loan, loan modification, loss mitigation, owe, real estate, Realtor, short sale
Before I get started I would just like to say that I am truly amazed by my Superbowl prediction (read the previous post)! I called the point spread….just for the other team. Minor details, oh well.
I’m going bald. I’m 38 and I’m going bald. At first I thought I had a vitamin deficiency but after the conversation that I had with a bank employee today I realized that it’s not a vitamin deficiency at all. Turns out that I spend about 2 hours every day literally ripping my hair out from the roots due to the incredible and often subhuman conversations that I have with bank employees! It’s maddening and has now left me hairless.
WHY, you ask, am I even talking to these people? Well, because the real estate market has shifted and I have had to shift my business right along with it. As awful as it sounds (and it is truly awful) I have so many clients that are in either a state of financial crisis, divorce, death or all of the above! I kid you not, I’ve seen it all. And most of these people have contracted with me to facilitate a short sale, which in layman’s terms means that I attempt to negotiate with the banks on my clients behalf to sell the home for less than what is owed on the property…..and sometimes it’s a lot less.
This morning I spent 15 minutes on hold with a bank prior to even getting a human voice. This is not altogether unheard of. When I finally spoke to someone, this is how the conversation went: (the names and information have been changed to protect the innocent)
Bank: Can I have your loan number please?
Me: 2849573894
Bank: Can you verify the address?
Me: 17846 SW Whogivesadamn Street, Nowhere
Bank: Can you give me the name of the borrower and their social security number?
Me: I gave it
Bank: What can I do for you today Mr. Brown?
Me: Well, first off, I’m not Mr. Brown.
Bank: oh I’m so sorry (and they always have a southern drawl). To whom am I speaking?
Me: This is Mr. Brown’s Realtor, well actually not Mr. Brown’s because see, he’s deceased so I’m the Realtor for the personal representative for the estate.
Bank: (obviously thrown way off by my last statement) Well ma’am (southern drawl again), would you like to speak with our loan modification department…..blah, blah, blah.
Me: WWWWooooooohhhw, stop talking. Did you not just hear what I said? The borrower is deceased and you want to send me to the loan modification department? HE’S DEAD! Can you modify a loan for a dead person? Shit, you can’t give a loan to a live person but you’ll modify the loan of a dead person??
That’s right, I lost it. It wasn’t long after that that I requested a transfer to the loss mitigation department and was placed on perma-hold again, only to have the line answered by another “customer no service” rep who was kind enough to place me on hold again in an effort to get the department that I needed and she stayed with me until they answered. She was the only normal person that I spoke to, and I miss her.
After I had been funneled through the phone system for the zillionth time I finally connected with Gayle in Loss Mitigation. While there I was able to explain the borrowers dilemma (remember, he’s dead) and then I requested her requirements for a short sale package given these circumstances, citing that I actually had offers to present to them. Amazingly enough Gayle, a woman who undoubtedly takes these calls all day long attempted to read the requirements from a script. I know this because if she had heard me tell her that the borrower was deceased, she never would have asked me to have my client present a “hand written hardship letter”.
I laughed so hard I peed my pants. What was I going to do, have his body exhumed and take his lifeless skeletal hand and hold a pen in it, ever so delicately, and beg it to come back to life in an effort to write a letter to the bank to explain why he couldn’t make his payments?????????? Seriously people, get a clue!
Obviously fed up with me and my attitude and not knowing what to do next, Gayle suggested that I simply send a copy of the death certificate. I obliged.
So do you see where I’m at? It’s not a good place, and that was only the first half hour of a very long day. I’m riding full steam ahead on the crazy train and I was just promoted to engineer. There is only one positive that will come out of all of this madness: since I’ll have no hair left I should be able to save about $100 on my cut, color, and style every month! Can anyone recommend a good wig shop?
The definition of torture is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
Okay, maybe this isn’t the definition for most people. It’s just the definition for those of us surrounded by people that we hope someday, somehow will actually give us a result different than what we have come to expect. But then why, after receiving the same results time after time do we expect something different? Because we hope and wish for something different, but we receive the same results……only to be tortured by those unrealistic expectations. And thus proving that we, in fact, have no one to blame but ourselves for our twisted reality.
Yikes, where did that come from?
As a Realtorin this volatile market set in economic uncertainty and unrest, I can honestly say that I have been playing the “torture” scenario over and over in my mind, and I have no choice. Many of my clients are in a bad place right now. It’s horribly unfortunate that I have clients in compromising positions that are now playing the role of victims, when in all reality and when I analyze their situation they are really not victims of anything but circumstance…….and aren’t we all? It’s how we deal with those circumstances that make us the survivors that we canbecome, or the victims that succumb.
I get so tired of listening to people who think that they have no choice, we all do!
Choices. They range in dimension beginninng with “Will I get out of bed today?” and ending with ”Will I get off of this couch and go to bed?”. Daily, the choices that we make impact the lives of the people around us. I personally chose at least 4 times yesterday to NOT run over people that crossed the street in front of my car. I also chose to go to work, feed my family, clean my home and do my laundry! I now choose to book a vacation……although I may choose to work harder so that I have spending money while I’m on vacation! Wow, all of these choices are exhausting!
Why are some people better equipped to make better choices? Why are some of us able to adapt and mold ourselves to our surroundings? And why are others incapable of this, choosing instead to run on the treadmill of life, going nowhere? I don’t get it……and if my smartass brother leaves me a comment on how it’s all about how kids grow up and who gets what lego set at 5 vs. who gets nothing at 12 I’m not going to be happy 
Honestly people, when you get to a certain age you have to throw the excuses out of the window…….speaking if which, I once chose to throw a computer out of a window while I was going through my divorce, those were good times!
Now, CHOOSE to make it a great day!!
In an effort to cut down on my business expenses I have recently moved my office back into my home. As a Realtor with several listings I really felt as though having an office outside of my home was a luxury and although I am selling now, I’m just not comfortable with where I see our market going. Many of my clients are in a very unfortunate financial bind and I believe that my expenses for my business are better used servicing my sellers via marketing services.
With that said there are some unfortunate distractions that come with a home office. Some are obvious, like having kids at home, finding laundry or house cleaning that needs to be done, blogging But the distraction that traps me the most is the television. Worse than that, it’s the 24hour a day news channels. All of them, I flip around. When I’m not at home I listen to the same news channels on XM stereo in my car. I have a problem and I know it!
What I really love is when they have someone that comes on and tells us how horrible the economy is, and then they have another person that tells us how we’re doing fine, and that we should stop holding onto our money and spend!! I’m becoming schizophrenic and I’m blaming the news channels!
But wait, before I hire my attorney to file a lawsuit siting “24hour News Channel Schizophrenia” I have decided to share some ideas that may help you and your family get through this “potentially” difficult economic time. If you have any suggestions, I would love for you to share them too, please comment!
- Lower your dining expenses by joining the Elks! If you have never been to an Elks Club you should try it. Most locations offer a nice menu at a low price and with the smoking ban going into effect in January (in Oregon) it makes the environment more tolerable. AND, cheap drinks, need I say more?
- Share the clothes off your back! I have a closet full of clothes that for one reason or another I don’t wear. Find a friend that is the same relative size as you and trade those clothes for the ones that they don’t wear. No brainer!
- Sell your crap. Craigslist is still free in Portland and E-bay is still reasonable. How much stuff do you have in your attic and closets that you will never need or use? I have a lot and when I think about the possibility of having to get a part-time job I think about how much time I could spend selling items that I don’t need or use…..tax free…..that’s a part-time job!
- If you do need to get a job, join some form of law enforcement or security. According to the 24hour News Channels crime is up, gangs are everywhere, there’s pirates off of our shores and there are illegals in our prisons. AND all of the so-called experts are predicting that it will only get worse!
I hope that you find these suggestions helpful! Although I am being somewhat tongue and cheek I have no doubt that the implementation of these ideas could save your family money during these hard times. Oh, I gotta go, the 24hour News Channel is now doing a story on how blogging can be detrimental to your health 
